|
|
|
|
Stories from people who have "been there!"(The names of the people writing the story have been changed for privacy) SM's Story: When I truly think about how autism has affected me, I can't help but look at all the times where I was scared to talk to someone. By its very nature, autism prevents me from being a social creature. As it is diagnosed very early in life, I've had to deal with knowing what I've had for almost all of my formative years. When I first spoke, I would say nonsense words like "boppity." My parents definitely had no clue what I was saying, and to this day, I don't know what I meant either. So I was enrolled in school from the age of two. I basically learned to speak (sensical words) by learning to read. So I could talk if I wanted to, but generally I was quite reserved for most of my childhood. Part of learning to read also involved saying what was on road signs and reading maps. This has made me into a roadgeek. But what truly makes me aware of my autism is the way I think. I'm very logical when it comes to my decisionmaking. This actually is a great help, since it's given me an understanding of how computers work. My mind functions similar to a computer. I've learned over the years what sarcasm is and have lightened up in terms of not taking everything so literally. I love to analyze the different possible outcomes of choices that are made, similar to how artificial intelligence can make decisions. But there are certain drawbacks to that style of thinking. My lack of social ability has basically given me fear of being rejected. I've always known I was different from most of my peers, and I took my share of teasing growing up. I couldn't understand why people treated me so bad, and that as a result prevented me from pursuing deeper relationships. I also feared anything I might say could be interpreted as dumb, so basically I kept my mouth shut. I'll say what I needed to to get by, but I still haven't fully gotten the courage to speak what is on my mind, for fear that I might be criticized. It has generally left me isolated from others. But fortunately, I've learned to overcome the difficulties I've faced by making friends I do feel have made me feel like I'm the same as any other person. These people mean the world to me, even though I may not always have the words to make it known to them. I know I'll slowly have to gain people's trust and that one day, I'll be able to talk as well as I can write. I know I can make it through life with autism hanging around my neck, and I hope that someday I will be able to find someone to love completely and honestly. It will take a little more time for me than for many people, but I do intend to live my life as I want.
|
|
Recovery Models n Definitions n Barriers to Recovery n Recovery Tools n International Recovery Awareness
|
